My family is drving me crazy, I just cant stand them sometimes. They are always fighting espically my parents and my older sister, and it makes me so mad because its over the most stupidest things and of course they always have to be right even when there wrong. so when they fight I just put in my head phones and turn the music all the way up so I drowned ou their voices but i know that they are taring at eachother every time they fight they just push at each other to see how far they can go until they snap. Today started out like anyother got up went to church  came home and then went shopping for my moms birthday present because her birthday is coming up soon. The whole tme well we were shoppoing my older sister was like "you guys get mom a present". "I shoulden't have to tell you to get her one you should just already now that".  My little sister showed me all these things that she thought my om would like so she went and showed my dad but as soon as my older sister saw she would say" I already looked at that for her or i got something like that for her last year." I felt so horrible for my sister sister because my older sister was just nagging at her and pulling at her the whole time. So finally, I just said to her stop it, your being so rude and such a ____ but then before the word slipped out I alked away, but in my head I said it. When we got home she was even for mad because she had to leave to go somewhere and my mom wasen't home yet and so she was like asking my dad where she was and he kept saying I dont know. Sometimes I just wish that I lived somewhere else and that I could just leave and get away from everyone that makes me so mad and just slip away to a world where everything was perfect, but you see things like that here cant ever happen so instead of going and slipping into my own little world. I go and listen to music whrn my parents start fighting and wish they would just stop it and get over it build a bridge and move on. Today was one of those days that I just wanted to dirve away and not come back for a very long time, but of course I cant because I dont  have my liscience yet. There are so many moments when you Just want to run away from your fear or pain and just hide, but I've found out that hidding is not going to so anything. The only way to make things better is by going and facing them head on and then and only then will things start to get better. Things might have to get worse before they can get better but they will get better.

The cold air blowing on your face, the feeling like your alone. The snow is so fluffy and the lights so bright. Life can be bard and it can be good too. Life is what is, and only you can change it. Don't throw your life away by waiting for something that's never going to happen. Go out there and make the best of your life.

Fall

Leaves on the ground, lots and lots of candy from Halloween, Colors are just starting to change. Sweatshirts and sweatpants are what you wear. Freezing your butt off at football games gloves and hats, So cold you can't feel your figures. Jumping in the leaves like when you were little,carving out your pumpkin. The smell of great baked cookies and apple pie. Getting together with family and eating a huge delousious dinner for thanksgiving. Getting up at 4:00 in the morning on black Friday just to go shopping. This is the fun of fall.

High school

Its only the first week and I already have to present 3 projects.. Which let me tell you I suck at doing. Standing infront of the class and talking is not my cup of tea, I get all nervous and forget what I'm going to say and my face gets really red too. But I guess I just have to get over that fear sonetime, and hopefully that sonetime is soon.

Math Is nit hard so far but that's just because it's only the first week,,I'm not the best at math by any means.

In us history we are learning about like these people who where alive when the ice age was and that had different grows all over the world and they came here my boat and island to island and by aomething else but I forgot. Anyways I totally do not believe in that at all and that is what is coming up on the test next week and it's hard for me to learn about something when the whole time in the back of my head I'm saying but I don't believe in that.

I have jewelry class, it's SO much fun but so hard! I'm making a bracelet and the wiring for the bracelet is silver and I'm also making a ring in thaT class but we havent started that yet

One of my teachers says that everything we will learn in his class we will use and we will not just " memorize stuff we will learn it he doesent want to see how much we can memorize . He wants to see how much we acaully know. Bill gates said in his 1 way of life, said "life is not far so get used to it."

we all change at some point in our lives...

we start to wear makeup

we start to forget about the friends we had...

.......

..........

and we evenually forget... and we make new friends,
"better" freinds





we forget to have fun.. and be who we are







 and we wake up one day and look in the

mirror and see we have become someone totally different

unaware of the things that were once important to us

we start to worry about how healthy we eat

and how nice we look

we even start to ''forget'' who is important

and how cute we look

and pretty soon you start to worry about how much you weigh



and then you start to be like every girl..
trying to get a guys  attention, but really you shoulden't be...
you should just be yourself, you should just be you <3



Summertime

It's almost over, and yet it seems like it's just began. I don't want it to go, no one does. But it always comes back. Peope act different in summer they are themselves. In summer people get hurt and love and are just plain and simply happy. And then in one momment it's school and everyone goes back to who they where before. In the summer there is a space where you can see right through time to where everyone different.

Summertime, the sweet taste of watermelon dripping down your mouth. The ocean water spraying mist in your face the taste on salt in your mouth. The feeling that you are free no worries just you and the world you live in, and everything is exactly like it's supposed to be and for those sweet times you are just who you are and your just you.

can you stop and enjoy the ride?<3

Change

People say they will not group but, but they do. They say they would never be a prepy person at school,they say they will never group to too fast...

But all that changes when you grow up,you start to wear makeup and start to think that your clothes is not good enough, so you go and get better clothes just for other people. you start changing and pretty soon you look in the morrior and you are someone totally differen. With all your makeup and hair and all your cute clothes, your not yourself. You have become "normal"

I've changed and not in the best ways I had my birthday on the 21 and I turned 15... I'm old enough to get a jod. And I look back and see all the things I wish I could have made slow down. I look at myself and see someone who is trying so hard to fit in, to be "normal" that they change, they become just like everyone else and pretty soon they are.

I was looking at pictures of me when I was younger just last year I was HAPPY and carefree and now I'm trying to be someone im not. And the thing is it's so natural for me to just change. That I don't even know I've changed so much until it's too late and I can't stop it.

I have been trying to read the bible and trying to pray more and think about god everyday and not just when I need him, but the thing is it doesent work, I forget about him until I acaully need him.

I think thats what change is, it's where you are yourself one day and different the next. It's not always bad it can be good too. But change is hard and complicated. But everyone changes and everyone is different. But just don't forget that you don't have to change for anyone, you can be yourself and by being your self people will like you for you.